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                                   Mabelvale Youth Association  -  Mabelvale, Ar

                           

 

 

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Humor

Two Retired Baseball Players

There were two 'very old' retired baseball players. Bob, (lefty) and Ray, (catcher-ray). Ray (catcher-ray) was dying , in fact he had 2 outs in the bottom of the 9th inning ,nobody on, and it's 9-0, not in his favor.

Bob, (lefty) was at his bed side, and Ray say's "I'm slipping fast old buddy".

Bob, say's "before you go, there's something I got ta know."

Ray, say's "what is it?"

Lefty say's "I've always wondered if there is baseball in heaven? When you get there can you find out and somehow let me know"?

Catcher-Ray said, "sure if there's a way to let you know , I'll do that for you".

So, it wasn't long and Ray passed away.

About a week had passed and one night Bob, had just went to bed and he heard this voice, "LEFTY --------BOB----".

Ray, "is that you?"

Yeesss it's , me, Ray, Catcher-Ray. I have good news and bad news for you........"

"The good news is YES, their is Baseball in HEAVEN .."

Lefty "that's great!!!! . Now what's the bad news?"

"Well", Ray said, "there is a game in two days and YOUR PITCHING !!!!!"

The Heavenly Baseball Game

The devil challenged St. Peter to a baseball game.

"How can you win, Satan?" asked St. Peter. "All the famous ballplayers are up here."

"How can I lose?" answered Satan.

"All the umpires are down here."

The Nature of Love

"Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too." --Greg, age 8

 

Top 10 Ways to Get on Your Coach's Nerves  

#10

  Super glue his clip board to the wall of the dugout.

#9

  Scream like a maniac the entire game.

#8

  Inform the meanest, biggest, most cantakerous umpire in the league that coach thinks he calls balls and strikes like a girl.

#7

  Hide all the practice balls and replace them with tennis balls.

#6

  Teach the players to respond to everything he says with, "Quite right, old bean."

#5

  Hide his car keys at every practice.

#4

  Fill his can of caffeine free diet coke with Jolt Cola and then watch him run those bases like a banshee.

#3

  Just for laughs put a large rubber snake in his equipment bag. 

#2

  During tense games have team dads come up to him every ten minutes or so and say, "Hey, big man, give me a hug!"

#1

  Call him every morning at 5:00 AM because you, "Just wanna talk baseball or softball!"

 

                                    

The Complete Abbott and Costello's Who's On First

 

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Last modified: April 04, 2005